Battle of the Cowdengelly cuties causes local unrest

As Lochgelly beauty Kirsty Mcdaid gushed enthusiastically on local radio about making it into the “toap hunner” of the so-called “High Street Honeys” competition launched by men’s magazine FHM, a former local beauty queen from Cowdenbeath stirred up controversy yesterday by announcing to the Central Fife Times, who urged its readers to vote for Kirsty in this week’s edition, that Kirsty is “a bit ey a dug”, and that her beauty owes much to digital trickery. Yvonne Paterson, who was Cowdenbeath gala queen in 2006, lambasted the young nurse’s FHM photos in a barbed attack - “anybody can see thae photaes are touched up – she’d never win a beauty contest in real life like I did” - and by so doing has re-ignited rivalry between the two mining villages, both famed for the legendary beauty of their womenfolk, with insults being heard traded today in pubs, bus stations and chip shops all over Central Fife. Meanwhile, Kirsty herself has remained unavailable for comment, though sources close to her have insinuated that Ms Paterson, a single mother, has made these comments as a way of drawing attention to her own recent beauty win in a desperate bid to gain publicity for the modelling career which failed to take off after interest in her gala queen title subsided. “It’s pathetic really,” said one of this blog´s sources, “fellow Fifers should be offering support to young Kirsty’s ambition to become top Lad’s Mag wank-fodder, not tearing her efforts down. It’s just sour grapes if you ask me.” (To prevent any unnecessary readers´ doubts, we would like to point out Ms Paterson is the woman with the hot chip in her mouth.)

With thanks, as ever, to the Central Fife Times for the additional reporting.